Forget Penn State, Let's Crack Down On Fat People!

There is a rampant, horrific epidemic of child abuse attacking America and I'm not talking about the serial sexual assault that was allowed to continue unreported by the administrations and police departments at Penn State and Syracuse. While those cases are undoubtedly deplorable, there is something of unprecedented evil happening in Ohio, and possibly all over the country: criminal fatness. That's right! Dirt bag parents, all over this country are feeding their kids too much and they must be stopped! Thankfully, heroic Cuyahoga County officials have done just that and removed an 8 year old boy from his mother and placed him in foster care. According to a story from The Blaze, even though the county does not have an official policy on dealing with obese kids, case workers removed the boy because they considered his mother's inability to control his weight a form of medical neglect. The mother has not been charged, much less convicted of a crime, but if the geniuses at Cuyahoga County consider her to be an unfit mother, that should justify any action they deem necessary. Hell, maybe we should just execute her! Let's not forget that all levels of government are authorized by the constitution to use any means necessary to insure the health and well being of the people. Okay, they actually have no such constitutional authority, but they're smarter than us, so they're going to do it anyway. I think we need to take a serious look at some of the other sadistic abuses that are being committed against kids by their parents. Keep in mind, the child does not actually have to be suffering the effects of the abuse, so long as there is the potential that he might at a later date. After all, the fat kid in Ohio, currently suffers from only sleep apnea. As you can see, this leaves a lot of opportunity to remove kids from the care of their idiot parents, who allow them to indulge in life threatening activities. For example:

• Driving-According to the CDC, eight people, between the ages of 15-19, die in driving accidents every day. However, roughly 35 million teens continue to drive, with new licenses being issued every day. Damn, this is going to take a lot of foster homes.
• Swimming-Yeah, it's fun and everything, but we all know it's a death factory. According to the lifeguard site Poseidon, 9 people die in unintentional drownings every day, drowning is the second leading cause of accidental death among children ages 1-14, and a swimming pool is 14 times more likely than a motor vehicle to be involved in the death of a child aged 1-4. Clearly, the number of swimming pools in this country borders on genocide.
• Cell Phones-First, there is the whole issue of talking or texting while driving, then you have the issue of the whole radiation/cancer thing. No I don't really believe that one, but I'm sure that at least a few people who have used a cell phone, have then also had cancer. So let's take away their kids, just to be safe.

I could have kept going, but I'm sure that these few examples, along with all the fat kids still out there will lead to every adult in America having to take in 5 or 6 foster kids, while losing at least one of their own. Let's be serious for a minute. Who really believes the government, at any level, is smarter than we are? It's been my experience that, whether you're dealing with the I.R.S., H.U.D., the state DMV, or your local tax collector, most govt. employees shouldn't be trusted to go to the bathroom alone. With few exceptions, they are lazy, stupid, and arrogant. They screw up everything they touch and they need to keep their intrusive noses out of our damn business.